I always thought there are 6 evils in us .. but I have found through my experience .. everything else ..anger jealousy addiction ..everything is created because of FEAR.
Have you noticed the cause we shout in anger ..because we are afraid ..we are afraid that someone might take away our property ..reputation …or whatever we think we possess.
We feel envy because we are afraid ..if we feel secure with what we have ..we won’t feel jealous of anyone.
We find addictions ..to run away from our reality ..our existence is so fearful that we tend to use alternates to make us forget that.
Everything is generated out of fear ….
It’s such a deep realisation. I was angry today because I felt people were trying to make me fearful.And I wanted to shout out that they don’t need to do that ..not to me ..not to themselves.And I found out I was sad because I was fearful ..fearful of what they say will be accepted as truth. .fearful that what I believe in that is “love”.. won’t ever win .
And then I found out ..how I am responding the same way as they are ..our cause is same ..just the expressions are different ..they responded by forcing fear into me ..and I responded by becoming sad.
If they are as much fearful as I am ..I close my eyes and imagine …keeping away the nature or the actions they took ..if they felt the fear like me .. I don’t hate ..I am not sad .
It’s ok !!
If I won’t understand their fear ..inspite of this experience ..then how can they understand me.
Saibaba please bless us all to love and love more and keep this fear in your feet..baba have mercy !
Baba gave me a lesson that my choices define me.
And now Sai told me my choices also change according to the situation I am in ..according to the knowledge I have ..and much more ..so I am not my choices either. 🤔
You have read about “messages are for a time being till they change .” This is what happens in our life.
Well ..I genuinely feel tired nowadays ..less physically, more mentally.I feel like I am fighting some external force ..but there is a kind of happiness inside me ..when I am silent , I feel like yess this is exactly where I am supposed to be ..to be tired ..to be moving forward taking Sai’s name ..to be somewhat irritated but still at peace from inside.Its a strange feeling!
I used to wonder how beautiful it is to help someone ..to help kids .I want to be like jaya wahi di.Sai shows me it’s not so easy as it seems.You need immense strength to do what you dream of.And Sai is that strength for me.
Last year when I dreamt of being in Pg ..I used to relate some signs and the sai devotee Vinny chitluri mam was a pediatrician ..then she left her city and joined shirdi hospital and treated kids there.How beautiful it would be na!
To be at shirdi .. but she went through alot before reaching there ..just like Jaya wahi di.
Sai always gives me the message :
“How will you be a diamond …if you resist to each rub.”🥰
Ohh lord! it seems so hard to trust you completely ..to surrender ..may you bless me with immense strength to do this.
Addicted to be called as a “good girl”
I feel bound with a “good image”.No one likes when someone thinks of them as stupid or ugly or dumb ..right? and so, we stick to the image of “being good”.
So, we feel hurt when someone tells us we are not beautiful or intelligent or smart.But, why does it matter..?
The answer is FEAR of being rejected.
If only I realise these are just perceptions ..and perceptions differ a lot. What is the use of beauty ..intelligence when I have to dedicate it all in Sai’s feet in the end.
When everything is his possession ..not mine ..I will be fine how so ever he keeps me.🤗
A very Happy Diwali to all ..I started writing this post at dusshera and completed at diwali.Maybe my ravan took this much time to end hehe😅.
May Sai be the lights we lit around our house .May we call Lakshmi in our inner home ..our soul to live forever.
May our heart be “dwarkamai”.
May we be nothing..and be so mad in love with Sai that this nothingness be our heaven.
I pray for your health and happiness ..may your family friends stay blessed too.