Hey guys .. it’s been long and I think this usually happens in residency ..that we forget even to live.😅
I used to think why doctors seem to be arrogant .. but if you study so hard.. work so hard and reach at a good status or post .. ego seems to be inevitable . I feel myself getting in the trap ..but Sai is somehow holding me off of it.
There is a professor ..right now where I am posted , he is the most egoless person I have ever seen. I don’t know why but he is absolutely free of the usual barriers I myself keep in between me and patient. He is knowledgeable and so humble . I imagine myself being a doctor like him.
I have found a typical beautiful characteristic in each of the person I met here ..be it professor , or seniors or my co pgs .
When I feel I am loosing it all .. sai shows me “I am exactly where I am supposed to be.”
I was talking to a nurse while my night duty was going on , I considered that nurse to be not so thoughtful. But what she said , changed my perception towards this phase.
She said .. “Ap log bht thak jate ho , dikhta hai pure din bhagte rhte ho .. dant bhi pdti rhti h ..Kam bhi itna krte ho. Par agar apse koi normally 18 ghnte Kam Karne ko bole to ap karoge kya ? Kitna Acha hai ki Pg bnai ..taki ap seekh sako .. jab ap itne ghnte mareej k Pas rhte ho tabhi ap ko itna Kuch dikhta hai ki kya hora hai ..kya chal rha h.Tabhi to ye teen sal krke ap kitne mature ho jaoge Sab seekh jaoge.”
How correct she was .. if I have been given an option ..I would have never asked for this much struggle ever .. but when I am forced to do such things ..I find out how powerful I am!
Sai Baba has a way to fill me with strength when I need it the most ..and I know each one of us has this inborn strength within us ..
I am trying to stay quite but it rarely happens hehe .. I have to counsel so many people that it’s hard to maintain peace within .
Maybe sai someday in some birth teaches me to culminate spirituality in stormy life.
I am glad that sai considers me this strong .. 😅
So, dear a reminder for you … If you are about to enter such a job or residency … Be cool with your irritation ..
It’s ok ..you will loose patients ..sometimes because of your inefficiency ..sometimes because of other things ..remember it’s ok ! Just ask Sai to teach you what things you can do to avoid such a thing next time.
You will shout at people ..and it’s ok .. as soon as you realise .. lower your tone and pour out some love ..they will forget how you shouted if their patient gets well . Sometimes , you have to raise your tone to make them understand ..and it’s not a crime. I used to think like that ..but now I understand why my elder brother told me “You have to talk to people in a tone they understand .”
It’s not about some grudge or revenge or I have some personal issue with them. But when their tasks or lack of knowledge can be dangerous to them selves or the kid we are treating .. we have to make it all clear the way they understand.
Its ok ! If it’s for well being of the patient.
You will lie and lie alot .. I have set limits ..but I have broken them too .. alot of times .. mostly now I know how low you can get sometimes .. because of fear all around .
Maybe sai did this to show me why my seniors do what they do ..everyone is scared here .. and so do I feel alot ..but Baba saves me most of the times.
But, it’s ok ..you will lie and it’s ok!
You will be lost once a while .. if you are not mentally prepared (like I was not ..for pedia) you will loose yourself once in a while ..and that’s ok ..you will be fine soon ..
You will miss your people alot ..your home and that’s ok too ..
You will enjoy alot 😊 .. with people around you ..yess ..you will make new friends …who will hold your hand .. you will get to know how strong you are when you will handle people and situations alone .
You will feel good when someone will be discharged with a smile .. you will feel sad when that cute smiling baby will be taking her last breaths ..for you will know you are nothing but an instrument in the hands of Sai ..the ultimate decision maker is him and only him.🙏
You did not treat this patient to good health ..you did not kill that patient ..you did what you could in those conditions and that’s ok darling ..this much is needed of you.
It’s ok ..if everyone is not ok ..
It’s ok if you are not ok..
Sai is always with us all taking care of everyone here and in the world after!
This is my residency with Sai ..I will keep you updated .. once a month maybe ..or as sai wills ❤️
take care sweet souls😍
Allah Malik !
Om Sairam ❤️🥰